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Map Out A Plan
By
Beverly Moore |
Question:
I asked a daughter to talk about her experience having her
mother visit with her recently. She lives 120 miles away.
Here are some excerpts from her return email.
Answer:
I learned from the coach that I need to live in my Mom’s
moments. It is not so stressful and in fact kind of nice to
slow down and live life moment to moment. It is rather
meditative for me and keeps Mom relaxed.
A good thing is that Mom is happy being with her kids. When
she visited I made sure the day was not filled with a lot of
things to do and if so, I needed to change my pace. I wrote
a plan for the day down on paper to let her know what was
going on. This worked only if she didn’t put it in her purse
which I think is full of a lot of forgotten things!
The car trip to my home is two hours so I stopped at rest
rooms even if she said she didn’t need to. I also gave
her a small map that shows the route we were on, asking for
her help. She loved to read the signs and then look at the
map and tell me where we were. The last part of the drive,
which is monotonous, I put on her favorite music (and mine).
She tapped her feet to Frank Sinatra, Rosemary Clooney and
Ella Fitzgerald.
It helped to know that Mom’s mental status waxes and wanes
when in a different surrounding away from home and that this
wouldn’t mean she’d stay confused. Our family knows how to
help her in her confusion now, so the visit was a good one.
I hope we can share many more now that I know how to do it
right. |
About The Author
Beverly is
owner of Alzheimer Coaching Services which serves eastern
Massachusetts and Rhode Island. ACS offers coaching to
understand dementia and learn how to keep the person with
memory loss integrated in family life. Title III E Older
American Act grants provide free coaching to families in 45
towns and cities in the Bristol, south Norfolk, south shore
and West Suburban areas. No referral is necessary. There is
no restriction of income or age. Beverly’s company is
located in Quincy and she may be reached at (617) 233-1145.
You may read more about her company’s services at
www.alzheimercoachingservices. com. Look for Beverly’s book
Matters of the Mind…and the Heart to be released early 2008
Pre-order your copy @ www.Advantagebookstore.com.
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