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"What Is The Best
Place For Me?"
By Kate Granigan |
 Marshfield
- This is a question I hear every day. As a Professional
Geriatric Care Manager, it is often part of my work to
assist families in finding the “best” living solution for an
elder.
Of course we all want the best for ourselves or our loved
one, but “the best” in the case of living options is not a
cookie cutter answer, but differs greatly, depending on a
host of variables. The answer to this question is not as
simple as it might seem, but deserves thoughtful attention
and careful examination to make the right choice. This
choice should be a good fit, not just for now, but for the
future. This takes good planning, guidance, honest dialog
and some hard work.
Here are a few steps that should be taken to ensure that
your choice of living arrangements is “the best” for you or
your loved one:
• Do your homework. There are many living
options today and not all are created equal. Understanding
the differences between each option, and why it might be a
good fit for you is critical. Do not be afraid to ask
questions about concerns that may arise such as how changes
in health or ability in functioning affects the ability to
remain in the setting, what happens if a hospitalization is
necessary and the location’s position on bringing in
additional help if needed. This is all part of “aging in
place,” and is important to consider in making your
decision. This may not be important now, but should be
considered to avoid an unnecessary move as things change.
• Have honest dialog with all parties. It is
not unusual when considering a move for there to be varying
perspectives of what is needed among family members.
Starting with an open dialog of why a move might be needed
and allowing everyone to share their perspectives can help
put concerns and goals on the table. Having a mediator to
assist with this as an objective observer of the situation
and to facilitate may be useful.
• Have an Objective Assessment. If there is a
good deal of discrepancy between what is thought to be
needed, it may be helpful to have an objective assessment
done to offer guidance and suggestions.
• Take your ideas on the road. Make a list of
possible options and make a visit to each location and take
a tour, ask questions and make notes. If possible, have more
than one person make the visits so that you are sure to have
a few perspectives. If you are out of state, using the
internet and getting reports from someone you trust is
critical.
• Compare. Make a list of pros and cons for
each setting and have another meeting with those involved to
review. Things to consider are size of community, assistance
available, social activities, ability to “age in place,”
finances, proximity to one’s community and family…all
considerations.
• Trail period. Many living communities offer
the option of a “Respite” or trial stay. This is a
great chance to “live” in the community before making a full
commitment.
• Making the move. If all of the above
mentioned is taking into consideration and a community is
chosen, using professional assistance in making the move go
smoothly can be a good choice to avoid unnecessary stress
for all.
Remember, a move at any time of life can be a huge
adjustment, even when it is the “best” choice. Recognize
that there is an adjustment period in any change and that it
is not unusual to feel regret and loss after taking the
plunge.
It can take up to six months to begin to feel comfortable in
a new community or living environment and often additional
support and attention is needed to make the new house a
home.
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About The Author
Kate Granigan, LICSW is Executive Director of C.A.R.E.
LLC, The Elder Life Specialists which helps its clients
attain their optimal level of functioning by delivering care
coordination and support services in a way that preserves
dignity and independence for elders. For more information,
you may call Kate at (781) 837-7444 or visit the C.A.R.E.
web site at www.care-elderspecialist.com. |
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