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Considering Moving An
Aging Loved One Into Your Home?
By
Libet Callahan |
Rockland
- As loved ones age, they often require assistance from
family members to help with everyday tasks that become
challenging, such as meal preparation, laundry and
housekeeping. Eventually, many family members find
themselves assisting in ways they never expected, such as
with hygiene and grooming.
This can lead to the common decision to move an aging loved
one into the home of a family member. According to AARP, one
out of four adult children lives with and cares for an
elderly or disabled relative.
Moving a loved one into your home, however, may take a toll
on the family caregiver, causing stress, fatigue and
strained relationships with family and friends. There are
additional options to consider, such as in-home care,
assisted living or a nursing home facility.
If you need help, you’re not alone. Recognizing your loved
one requires additional assistance beyond what you are able
to provide is just the first step to ensuring your loved one
gets the assistance needed.
Family caregivers should consider the following factors
before moving an aging loved one into their home.
Consider Your Daily Schedule and Availability.
Caring for an aging loved one is a great way to repay the
nurturing love and care they gave to you. If you are working
a full-time job and caring for children or grandchildren of
your own, however, it may be difficult to take on the
additional responsibility of someone requiring constant
assistance.
Be realistic about how much time and energy you have each
day to devote to your aging loved one. Also, understand that
the level of care you need to provide will most likely
increase over time.
Review and Consider the History of Your Past
Relationship. Getting along well with your loved one
while living apart and being able to live together
peacefully and successfully under the same roof are
dramatically different, so you need to have an objective
assessment about the true state of your relationship. The
little things that may irritate you now will become major
factors when you are together 24 /7. If you have a strained
relationship and have a hard time resolving conflicts, be
aware that the relationship will not magically improve if
you live together. Also, if your loved one suffers from
Alzheimer’s or dementia, consider whether you will be able
to handle the possible personality changes that may come in
the future.
Ensure Your Home Is Physically Safe for an Aging Adult.
Ensure that your home doesn’t pose any health or safety
hazards. For example, older adults should ideally live on
the first floor of your home to avoid stairs. If this is not
possible, you may need to have an automatic stair lift
installed.
You may need to put in a ramp if there are stairs leading up
to the front door of your house. Additional modifications
may be needed in the bathroom, kitchen and bedroom to
accommodate walkers and wheelchairs and ensure safety.
For a home safety checklist, visit http://www.rightathome.net/assets/
PDF/HomeSafetyChecklist-2.pdf.
Consider the Financial Impact. Moving an aging
loved one into your home may become a financial burden or
may provide financial benefits. Come to a financial
agreement with your loved one and other family members
before any living arrangements are made.
Consider having your loved one contribute to household costs
to ease the burden. Recognize that you and your family may
have to make sacrifices to make the situation work, such as
using your savings account or cutting back on entertainment
spending and rethinking vacation plans.
Include other family members involved in your loved one’s
care in the discussion. There is no right or wrong way to
deal with finances, and agreeing on an arrangement first can
help you avoid disagreements later. Taking a broad view of
the situation and determining which solution is right for
everyone involved can lead to a happier and healthier
family. If you decide to move your aging loved one into your
home, remember to allow yourself an occasional respite from
care-giving and consider hiring an in-home professional care
agency. Trained and bonded caregivers are available to
provide companionship, homemaking, physical assistance,
hygiene and wellness for your loved one.
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About The Author
Libet Callahan RN, BSN is the President and Owner of
Right at Home Homecare in Rockland and serves families
throughout the South Shore. Right at Home provides
companion, homemaker and personal care services that enable
seniors and others to remain in the comfort of their own
home for as long as possible. Libet is a graduate of
Columbia University School of Nursing and has worked in
community nursing on the South Shore for many years. Libet
may be reached at (781) 681-3545 or email at libet@rah-southshore.com.
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